Sunday, March 31, 2019

I can't fly

Yesterday was a super nice spring day. Me, Mom and Dad were outside for a long time. Mom and Dad were busy with the mower and the John Deere tractor. Well, Mom was sort of busy. Dad was watching and "giving her pointers" on how to drive them. I'm not sure that's a productive use of his time because Mom ignores him a lot. 

I got yelled at once for being in the way. Then I was more careful. When Mom yells at me outside, I pay attention. I was paying attention when Mom sneaked off and walked down to chat with Cousin Dave without me, too. I did not like that but apparently what I don't like doesn't matter sometimes. 

We were almost finished and were sitting over at the shed, you know, chewing the fat as Dad says. It wasn't real fat, though. I've chewed real fat and it is delicious! I love real fat! What was I saying?

Oh yeah. We were sitting over at the shed. Dad was in his chair and Mom was sitting on the loader. A little gust of wind came along and the umbrella on the sunroom porch sailed over the house! I was too surprised to even bark! All Mom said was she didn't hear any glass break. She went and checked it out while I stayed with Dad. The metal parts of the umbrella were all twisted and bent. Mom said it can't be fixed and she'll have to get a new one. 

I hope she means that. I like our little porch. It's our space, me and Mom's. We have good times out there in the evenings and on Saturday and Sunday mornings. 

I'm Deuce, and I know even pack members need their own space. And shade. Don't forget to get a new umbrella, Mom!

Saturday, March 9, 2019

Everyone needs a lazy afternoon

Today was Saturday. I love Saturday! Mom is home with me and Dad, and she takes me outside a lot. It didn't rain or snow today, but the ground is still wet and cold. My paws are pretty tough but I don't like cold too much. 

I was really lazy today. So was Mom. She got up early to go deposit a check. What's the Fed? Mom said the Fed was kind enough to give her some of her money back but the way she said it makes me think she meant something else. What are income taxes? I bet I'd get more Grillers if these Fed dudes didn't take some of Mom's money from her. Anyway, Mom went to the bank but she made me stay home with Dad. 

When she got home, we went out for a bit, but like I said, the ground was wet. We didn't stay out long. Mom did some laundry and worked on a story. She said she figured out what was wrong with it and now she could move it forward. 

Mom keeps an old sheet on the couch for me. She takes it outside almost every day and shakes my fur off it. I hit the sofa for a snooze while she was busy, and don't you know it - Dad took a picture and sent it to Mom. Okay, so my tongue was sticking out a little bit. It's only my tongue. I show my tongue all the time but for some reason, doing it in my sleep makes it funny. 

I'll tell you what's funny. Humans are funny, as in weird and strange funny.

Let me tell you what woke me up. Mom said if we went to Sonic, she'd buy.  That's all I had to hear. Even in my sleep "Sonic" gets through to me. I KNOW that word.

I love Sonic! I got a puppy burger! It was soooooo good! 

Now we're lazing in Mom's office for a while until Mom is done working for the day and it's time for bed. 

I'm Deuce, and it was a great day to be me!

Sunday, March 3, 2019

I'm insulted!

Daddy dumped his coffee on me! I'm insulted! Don't I look insulted? Yes, I do. Because I AM. 

I was minding my own business. Honest I was! Daddy had just brewed that cup and was headed for his chair. I was watching out for him but he was not watching out for himself. He dropped his cup and hot coffee went all over me. It's a good thing I'm a Lab and have a nice, thick coat with an almost waterproof layer. 

Mom came to me right away and dried me off, even before she wiped up the mess. I'm going to smell funny now. Mom says after Dad makes another cup of coffee and gets out of the kitchen, she'll wipe me down with a clean, wet rag. She doesn't want me to be sticky. That's good because I don't like the sound of "sticky."

I hope Mom hurries up and gets me clean so I can get back to my nap. 

You know... on the sofa.