Thursday, January 14, 2021

It's my birthday! I'm five!

Today is my birthday! I'm five years old! 

Is that old? Mom says "not really." What the squeaky-toy does that mean? Am I old or not?

I don't feel old. I feel pretty good. I felt a lot older when I hurt my cruciate tendon, but Mom got the right medicines for me and everything is good to go as long as I don't overdo it. Mom is pretty careful to make sure I don't. 

But come to think of it, sleeping on the big bed does feel better than sleeping on the floor. I don't think I've always felt that way. I used to think I had to be on the floor at Mom's feet when she works in her office, but I can see her just fine from the big bed. So it makes sense to sleep on the soft bed, right? 

Mom and Dad wanted a video of me to help them remember me at age five. Humans must really have trouble remembering as they get older. Will I get like that? I'd hate to forget how to play ball, or how to behave. And what if I forget how to listen to Dad? He needs me, you know. My job is to look out for him when Mom's not home. 

Maybe this being five isn't all it's cracked up to be. I guess I'll have to do like Mom says and take it one day at a time. Until then, maybe Dad will take me out and we can play ball again! That would be a swell birthday present! 


Sunday, January 3, 2021

Mom had all my blogs put together

 I learned that we've been blogging together for almost five years. That's like my whole life! It's a pretty cool way for me and Mom to remember the important things we've done together. And the fun stuff, too!

Understanding how it all works is Mom's job. I just get to be me and we like it that way. Mom's a writer and she gets to be herself when she blogs. Dad's job is to reason things out and tell us which end of which cable goes in which slot to make the television work. Loki's job is to catch vermin. 

Okay. Now Mom is staring at me so I need to get serious. My job is to look out for Mom and Dad, especially on a walk.

I'd better get back on topic so I can get a snackie when we're finished blogging.

We started Deuce's Day to record my life. Mom says I'm probably the only dog she'll have all her memories of recorded. Mom talked about her other dogs, the ones that came before me, over at her writing blog. Some of it is pretty sad but sometimes a dog's life is sad. 

Anyway, Mom went to this place online called Blog to Print and they put all my blogs through the end of 2020 into one .pdf for only $10! Now we don't have to worry about losing the history of everything we've done together. 

Mom and Dad told me we've started a new year. It doesn't feel any different. My birthday is coming up and I'll be five. Time really does fly when you're having fun! 

Time flies when we go for a walk, too. What do you say, Mom? Think we can get outside today? 

Monday, December 28, 2020

I saw a lot of people on our walk


Yesterday was a really sunny day, but it was cold. I didn't think Mom would want to go for much of a walk, but she surprised me! She bundled up in this long poofy coat with a hat and scarf and we headed out. We've been going back the old homestead lane lately. Mom likes it that she doesn't have to jump any creeks. She says if she'd slip off a rock, then her would be really cold. 

Mom took a few videos and then today she edited them and put them all together. Humans like to learn new things all the time. So do I if a snackie is involved, but Mom just drinks more coffee. Not my thing.

We saw a lot of people on our walk, too. It was Sunday so Mom wasn't too surprised. She had to put me on the leash three times, not because I'm bad, but because I'm sort of a big dog and people are afraid of big dogs they don't know. I get it, but I'm glad those people know I can protect Mom if necessary. 

I hoped we'd go on a long walk again today, but Mom wasted a lot of time at the computer instead. She knows I'm more fun, but what's a guy to do? We went out for a few shorter strolls to the mailbox and around, but it's not the same as a good long walk. 

The videos Mom took are down below. I think her shadow looked funny, but then she had on a funny hat!

Friday, December 25, 2020

I got a puppy for Christmas!

I got a puppy for Christmas! 

I was worried, too. When Mom said I was getting a puppy, I thought maybe she meant Sadie was coming to live with us. I don't think I'd like that. 

Sadie is too high energy, even for me! And she's so small. Mom and Dad tell me I used to be that size but I just don't remember that. Anyway...

I love my puppy! I've had teddy bears and rabbits and even a giraffe, but I don't remember having a puppy. Maybe I did. Mom might know but I don't know how to ask her.

This is better than a live puppy. Seriously. Sadie came with Cousin Dave to visit and it was ... not my finest hour. She grabbed my puppy and I did not like that. I growled a little bit - not much, I swear! But Mom noticed. 

I'm not sure I like my puppy as much as I did before SHE slobbered on it. Mom says I'll change my mind in a little while. 

Mom thinks I'll warm up to Sadie, too, when Cousins Dave and Sharon can bring Sadie along on a walk with me and Mom. We'll see. 

It's Christmas Day, and it's good our pack is together. There's going to be a ZOOM call soon with Dad's litter, and I have to remember not to bark. Mom has giblets cooking for me, too. I love giblets! I think I'd better go get ready for when Mom cuts them up. She might drop one and I'd better be there when that happens. 

So from our pack to your pack, we wish you a Merry Christmas! 

Oh, and here's a short video of Mom being silly. She knows I don't like to share my toys.

Sunday, December 20, 2020

That felt good!

It might be a cool 39F outside, but Dad cranked up the heat to a warm 75F inside. That should have been my first clue, but hey. I was napping. A guy needs naps to stay sharp. 

I should have been paying attention to Mom when she pulled Dad's chair out of the shower and put down a bunch of towels, but hey. I was still napping. Or maybe I was growling at the noise outside. I thought I heard something and needed to alert Dad. He shushed me. 

What gives, Dad? I was doing my job!

Anyway, when Mom called me I went to her only we weren't going to her office. Oh, no. She pointed into the bathroom and I knew what that meant. Puppy shampoo. 

I don't mind getting a bath even though it's not as much fun as the creek. Mom sprayed me, shampooed me, and rinsed me in about five minutes so it was pretty quick. Then she used a bunch of towels to get me dry and I like that! It feels like a massage and what's not to like about Mom giving me a rubdown? 

Well, I didn't like the part where she reamed out my dried my ears, but she had to do that. I'm pretty sure she's going to squirt that icky stuff in them, too. I'm waiting for it so I'm prepared. I've learned the quicker I sit and be still, the faster it's over and done with. I told you - I'm Deuce and I'm a good dog! 

So now I'm all clean and shiny again! And fluffy! I wonder why Mom hasn't told me I smell sweet? 

PS. That's a good picture of 'lil 'ol me. Look at my long legs! 

Monday, December 14, 2020

A long walk on December 13, 2020

dry creekbed

It was a bright, sunny day and Mom asked me if I wanted to go for a walk. 

Mom. For the record, you don't have to ask me that. I'm ALWAYS ready to go on a walk. 

Maybe I should reconsider that position. 

When Mom said "walk" I figured we'd go our usual route. I should have paid closer attention to what she and Dad were discussing instead of barking and prancing in front of the door. Bad me. Hindsight says she was explaining our route and timing to Dad in case he needed to call Cousin Dave to go look for us. 

Off we went and my first clue something was different was we turned right at the end of our lane instead of left. That was fine. I'd been down the road a few times before and I'd even been back the old homestead lane a couple of weeks ago. But Mom didn't turn off on the trail we took before. She kept going. 

We came to another trail and she kept going. Now I was looking over my shoulder at her and wondering where we were headed. We passed a third trail and came to an old, dry creek bed. Mom shook her head and told me that when she was a girl, her and a couple of friends used to have a little dam that you can sorta tell where it was, and a "swimming hole" in that creek. It wasn't very deep, but on a hot summer day it was a nice place to get wet and just hang out after riding their bikes back there. She said I would've really liked the old swimming hole. 

the old pond
After that we turned around and went back. I thought we were going home but nooooooo. Mom turned onto the last trail we'd passed and we headed up a big hill. Then she turned again and pointed to a big circle of weeds she called the old pond. 

Well, okay, it did have a tiny bit of water in it, but a pond? Nope. More like a mud puddle and when I headed for it, boy did I get hollered at! I guess that's off-limits for poor 'lil ole me. Mom did say she was surprised it had any water in it. It used to be a lot bigger and you could float a little boat on it. 

We walked past the mud puddle pond and finally headed downhill. We passed another trail and I realized where we were! We'd been up this trail a couple of weeks ago! Mom really did know where she was going!

I was getting tired by now but I knew our next stop was home. I couldn't wait to get there, get my vest off, and take a nap! 

It was a fun walk. Mom says we'll do it again when the weather is better. We can't go today because it's snowing now. Mom's right. Snow isn't the kind of wet I like. Wet paws aren't so bad, but I don't like to have a wet head. 

Unless I've ducked my head under the water in the creek. That's different. 

Saturday, December 5, 2020

A trip to the vet and I think I'm insulted

Mom took me to the vet this morning at O-Dark-Thirty. I've learned that O-Dark-Thirty is really early. It comes any time before Mom's second cup of coffee. 

When Mom opened the door of my truck and said "stay," I thought she was joking at first. Turns out she wanted to get my attention so I didn't jump in before she had the door all the way open. I've done that a few times, being excited to go for a ride and all that, and it never works out well for me. Mom was right. I need to be patient and wait for her or Dad to say it's okay to jump. 


It seems that sticking my head underwater when I play in the creek is not a smart thing to do. I dived in so deep last weekend that my ear got infected. That's why Mom hauled my black arse to the vet. 

I didn't like it much, either. 

Mom couldn't go in with me and I really DID NOT LIKE THAT!!!! Then those girls picked me up and dropped me on the scales! Mom watched them through the glass door and she was not happy. They didn't even give me a chance to get myself centered and then step on the scales. 

AND THEN they said I'm fat!!! They said I need to lose two pounds! 

I don't think so. I walk every day and most days a couple of times a day. Dad takes me out every few hours and we go to the end of the lane and we play ball. Mom takes me on long walks all the time and while Mom might walk a mile and a half, or even two miles, I'm running ahead or into the woods and covering a lot more ground than her.  

My dog food says I can have up to 4.5 cups of chow a day and I don't get that much. Mom puts three cups in my bowl and I'm a good dog. I only eat when I'm hungry which means some days I don't eat much at all. Some days I don't eat any dog food. There is always food in the bowl for me when I want it (except right after I've chowed down, of course). I just know I should only eat when I'm hungry. 

I am not fat. I have MUSCLES. I'm not some pampered city dog. I run all the time. I think Dad should take those silly girls for a walk and see if they can keep up with his chair. I bet they can't, but I can. 

Mom took my picture when we got home and I'm still svelte! Okay, so it's not a great photo but look at those long legs! Look at that nipped waist! I'm simply taller and larger than the Lab breed standards, and therefore a tad heavier than the standards allow. It's not a bad thing I grew up to be a big, strong fellow. 

I'm Deuce and they insulted me. 

And to pile on another insult, Mom has to squirt smelly ointment into my ears for the next seven days. 

The moral to this story is, I'm never getting out of bed at O-Dark-Thirty on a Saturday morning again! Bad things happen if Mom doesn't get a second cup of coffee on Saturday morning. 

Friday, November 27, 2020

A long walk but Mom wasn't lost

Yesterday was Thanksgiving Day. The turkey was wonderful! And the giblets were to die for! I wish Mom would give me all the giblets, but nooooo. She doles them out like they're precious or something. Why does she do that? 

We had a Zoom call with Dad's siblings and I forgot to use my inside voice. Yeah, I barked. In my defense, they sounded kind of strange with their voices coming out of Dad's phone. Mom just petted me and said it was okay I forgot. She understands. 

Today is something Mom and Dad call Black Friday. Hey! I'm black! Is today about me? What? No? Go figure. 

Mom was home today so we decided to take a walk. It started out normal, but then Mom said she wanted to show me an old trail she used to walk all the time as a girl. I was ready to go! 

It's a pretty cool trail. It goes along the side of the big hill and up toward the top. There's another trail that comes in from the top of the hill, but Mom said we'd have to do that one when mushroom season is in. Mom knew where she was so I didn't worry. Then it happened. The trail Mom wanted to take to go home was closed. Mom said, "not a problem."

And it wasn't. We were so far up the hill we could our house so we really did know where we were. We knew if we followed the "new" trail it would intersect with an old homestead lane. Then there was another sign saying THAT section of the trail was closed. Who are these people who manage the state park woods? I peed on the post just because I could. 

Onward we went until we finally came out on the old lane about a mile deeper in the woods than we would have gone if they hadn't moved the trail. It was all good, except for the horse manure incident and I don't want to talk about that, or what happened to me when I got home. I'll just say some soap and water were involved, I'm sort of shiny again, and let it go at that. 

I had a really good time, and so did Mom, but it's good to get back home and relax. My paws are tired little puppies!

Saturday, November 21, 2020

I guess I have to put up with him

Loki the cat

It's getting colder at night, and while I'm all warm and toasty in the big bed, that idiot Loki likes to sleep outside. In the cold. 

Okay, so he's on a nice chair inside the screened-in patio, but that chair is not as comfy as the bed. If it was, Mom would sleep in it and she doesn't. Mom's not stupid, you know. 

November is the time of year it starts to get cold here. There's less daylight and even less bright sunshine. Like today. I know the sun is up there because I can feel it on my black fur, but I can't see it because of the gray clouds. Those clouds won't stop me and Mom from going for a walk, though. 

Back to Loki, he slept inside all night the other night. And where did he want to sleep? On the bed with me, Mom, and Dad. I did not like this. He sleeps on Mom's feet and then she kicks ME to make me move so she has more room. I say NO FAIR. This should not be my problem. Loki needs to find another place to sleep. There are lots of other nice places, even another bed! 

Mom says if any little mouse snuck into the house it's "dead meat." Boy, that sounds nasty. I like meat but mouse? Nooooo. If that skanky cat nibbles it, that's one thing. I am a dog. I prefer BACON! 

I guess it's okay that Loki is sleeping in the house again. I don't want him to turn into a popsicle on the patio. That would make Mom sad. I guess I'll just have to put up with him sleeping on the bed. But I'm warning him - if Mom kicks ME, I'm going to knock him off the edge onto the floor whether Mom and Dad like it or not. 

I'm Deuce. I was here FIRST!

Friday, November 6, 2020

I'm a star! I did another book cover!

I'm a star! Mom always told me that and now she made me one - again! 

Okay, I think when she told me I was a star she really meant I was one of the lights in the night sky for her, but that was before I posed for book covers. Now lots and lots of people will see me! 

Why is Mom telling me to calm down? This is exciting! 

Okay, maybe not. Not everyone will like this book even though it has my picture on the front. But they'll like MY picture, right Mom? 

And the story is about a black lab - like me!

Wait...what? It's not? 

That's just not right.