Saturday, November 20, 2021

I was only trying to help!

It seems that occasionally, I can get myself into trouble without really trying very hard. It happened today. I wasn't sure at first because Mom LAUGHED at me and grabbed her phone to take my picture. I don't think Dad was very amused, but I didn't get fussed for it so I guess that's a good thing. 

Dad punched a hole in one of the tires on his fancy power chair. This could be bad if his tire goes flat and he's not at home. He'd be stuck. Anyway, he asked Mom to bring home a tire patch kit so she did. Then it was kinda cold today and Dad thought he'd better check his innertubes inside where it was warm. I thought I'd help.

Bad idea, Deucie. Bad idea. 

But here's the thing. I only wanted to help. Dad asks me to pick stuff up off the floor all the time. And this tube thingee looked like it would bounce and be fun so I snatched it up. I didn't have a chance to chew it! I didn't chew it! And I got laughed at! 

Of course, I was bad because I did not put it down when both Mom and Dad told me to. I held on to it, hoping they'd change their minds. But noooo.... 

Mom took it away from me and put it in the spare bedroom and closed the door so I couldn't get to it. Some days I just don't know about my parents. I almost never have bad ideas so, you know, I deserved the pass. 

The next time Dad asks for help, I think I'll just stare at him like I don't know what he's saying. It's better than Mom laughing at me. 

But remember - I did NOT chew it up. Don't I deserve an atta-boy for that? 

Wednesday, November 17, 2021

Let's hurry this thing along!

I know it's there, resting in the freezer. I SAW it when Mom brought it home. I'm not just any dog. I'm DEUCE!!! I can read and the label said TURKEY!!!!!

And I know from experience that inside that ball of ice are GIBLETS!!!

Who does Mom think she's dealing with here? If I had thumbs, I'd get the turkey out of the freezer and go for the giblets now. 

Mom and Dad are planning a Thanksgiving dinner next week, but why do we have to wait? You know what they say, right? A bird in the mouth is worth two in the freezer. 

This waiting is just awful. 

Monday, November 8, 2021

Sunny day walkabout


Yesterday was a really busy day! We went out to pick up sticks...I love sticks! Sticks are fun! Not after Mom tosses them on a fire, but before. Anyway, we went out to do a bit of clean-up so Dad doesn't get his chair stuck when he's down at the shooting range. 

It was perfect weather to be outside, but the ground was a wee bit damp. I felt it in my legs by bedtime, but it didn't stop me from hopping up onto the bed with Mom.

While we were out, Mom and I took a walkabout around the yard, and of course, Mom did that video thing as we went. So here's my video story of yesterday!

I'm Deuce, and I'm a star!

Monday, October 25, 2021

Black on black, that was me

The pack has been enjoying the fall weather. There are deer everywhere! And squirrels! Mom says they're here munching on all the acorns. That makes no sense. I tasted an acorn. Yuk. Who would want to eat an acorn? Make mine steak! 

I chase the deer out of the backyard almost every day. It's great exercise. Mom and Dad are winding down the outdoor projects. Mom's cleaned out her garden corral and Dad got the old Craftsman mower stored for the winter. He spread some gravel out and got all the attachments for the John Deere lined up for the winter. Mom moved some pots into the little greenhouse. It's been sort of slow and lazy work, but we needed the break. 

The other day, it was good weather to burn the brush pile again. Our yard is ringed by a lot of trees and we gather up the branches when they break off, and put them on a pile. It's a never-ending job but that's okay. When it's time to burn, we can sit back and watch the fire. This time, we all piled into the Colorado, except for Loki, and watched the burn. 

The backseat of the Colorado is pretty comfy for a dog my size. Mom put down a special seat cover just for me. I bet I could really snooze there if they'd let me, but noooo. I can only get in Mom's truck when she's in it, too. 

So we all watched the fire. It's always great when the pack is together. 

I bet you're wondering why there's not a picture of me. Well, it's a simple answer. Black dog on a black seat cover in a black truck on a cloudy day. The camera made me vanish! Pool! It was... wait for it... black magic! 

Thursday, September 30, 2021

It's not nice to tease me, Dad


Dad is really good at putzing around in his shed. Putzing is like puttering. Or "working on a project" only he knows about. We did that today. 

I'm not sure what he's working on but it involves 2x4 lumber and a lot of noise. I usually don't pay much attention, but then the magic happened! Dad opened the doors on MY truck! So of course I jumped right in! 

And that's as far as I got. 

Dad had no intention of taking me for a ride. He just messed around with the running board and left me sitting there like the good dog I am. Then he took my picture and sent it to Mom and now it's on a blog post. 

That's the way things work around here. 

Sunday, September 26, 2021

One weekend, two walks

 It's fall! Okay, I'm a dog and I'm not sure what that means, but Mom and Dad sure like it. If they like it, I love it. 

I think fall means it gets cooler at night, and that's okay. I'm a pampered pup and get to sleep on a king-sized bed with Mom and Dad. I get the middle and I like it there. I need to keep an eye on my parents. Plus, they're good props for when I need to cool down my belly and stretch out with my paws in the air. 

Yesterday, me and Mom took an early morning walk around our big loop. Are seven thousand steps a lot of steps? Mom talks like it is. I was tuckered when we got back but it was great fun to be out in the woods without all the gnats and mosquitoes flying around my head. Mom agrees. 

This morning, we went for a walk past the old reservoir and Dad went with us. He can't take his chair across the creek because he doesn't want to short out his wheel motors, so he waits for me and Mom to finish our walk and come back. We're glad he does that. 

Mom took some pictures but they weren't many of me. What gives, Mom? I thought I was your favorite photography subject? Should I be worried? AND Mom forgot to take snackies along on the walk today. Mom? Don't you love me anymore? 

Boy, am I getting the look... Of course, Mom loves me. I know that. Just teasing ya, Mom. 

Mom's pictures are pretty woodsy photos and she made a collage so we would remember the weekend. I'm not going to forget. I'm smarter than that. 

On the way home today we ran into Cousin Dave and Cousin Sadie just beginning their walk. Sadie is a nutter. She always tries to jump on me! Mom tells me to chill out but it's not fun getting whacked on the nose so I keep my distance so Sadie can't reach my nose. Problem handled whether Mom and Cousin Dave like it or not. It's MY nose. 

We might go for a walk again tomorrow, we don't know yet. We'll have to see what the weather is, and Mom needs to check the hunting season schedule. I might have to start wearing my orange vest again soon. I wonder if Sadie will get one to match? 

Our walks were fun but it's almost time for Mom and Dad to start dinner. I wonder what we'll have? Maybe I'll get another slice of Fresh Pet for a before-dinner snack! That would be wonderful! I'm really looking forward to anything but dry dog food. 

I'm Deuce, and I deserve a people plate of my own! 

Monday, September 13, 2021

How could she forget?

 Mom forgot she had a video of ME to post. Can you believe it? She took it the last time we had a brush pile to burn. I always go along to help so Mom has a lot - I mean A LOT - of opportunities to get a video of me. 

Next time, don't forget to show everyone my video, okay?

Tuesday, September 7, 2021

A long ride in Mom's car!

 Yesterday started out like any other day. I got Mom up so she could open the door for me. I chased the deer out of my backyard. I did my other outside activities and then went back inside for a "good boy" snackie. Then me and Mom settled down in her office so she could check her email and stuff on her computer. Yeah, it was pretty typical. 

When we finished with the computer stuff, we joined Dad to check in with some of the YouTube channels they follow. Do you think I'll ever get my own channel? I don't think so, either. Making videos is a lot of work and Mom's already pretty busy. I'm not giving up hope, though. 

I'm Deuce! I'm handsome enough to be a star! Whatcha say, Mom? (Boy, did I just get a look...)

Dad found something interesting when he was surfing the internet. It's a place about an hour north of where we live that raises chickens. 

Hey! I like chicken! I like eggs! We should get some chickens for me! (Boy, did I just get another look...)

It was a really nice day. Not too hot, not too cold, and lots of sunshine. Mom said we should go see it, which confused me. Mom knows what a chicken looks like. AND THEN IT HIT ME!!!! MOM SAID WE!!!

She meant I could go along for the ride! In the Charger! Well, I hot-footed it right out the door and hopped into the backseat! No need to tell ME twice! 

When we got there, I was really disappointed. There wasn't a chicken or an egg in sight. It was just a big field of sunflowers and lots and lots of people taking pictures and videos of them. 

People are weird, but it made Mom and Dad happy, so there ya go. I'm happy, too.

Anyway, we headed home, and like always, Mom knew right away when I started to get peckish. She went through a McDonald's drive-thru and we got lunch. I love getting a puppy burger. It's sooo good! Just the roll and the burger without all the sloppy stuff people eat. I mean, who really likes pickles? Not me. 

It was good to get back home and relax. We chilled on the patio for a little while and just enjoyed the nice weather. And do you know what we had for dinner? CHICKEN!

Saturday, August 28, 2021

I must have incurred karma somewhere

Saturday! Yea! Mom said we were going for a long walk and I was there, baby! 

I got a little antsy at first. Mom said we were going and then she sat down at the computer. What was up with that? Thank goodness she wasn't there long. I would have had a spasm or something!

It was really misty outside and Mom thought it was really cool. I didn't care. We were going for a walk! 

Mom said we were going the long loop so down the road we went, not up the hill to the old reservoir. And then things got weird. We turned back on the old homestead lane and it was all different. Like really different. So that's what all the noises I've been hearing have been about! The people who own the lane have smoothed it out and put down a really firm gravel base. It's a lot easier to walk on now and I don't need to be careful and watch for broken glass. That's all good. Mom says that since they're almost finished, we can walk back there more often again.

So we were checking it all out and went up to the one stream. It dries up a bit in August and sure enough, no water. We turned around to get back to the trail and that's when Karma kicked my black ass. 

There stood Sadie. 

In the middle of my walk - in the middle of MY woods. There she was. Cousin Dave and Cousin Sharon were with her, but I was so piqued I didn't talk to them. When Mom said we could walk together, I wanted to howl. What if she came home with us again? We babysat her once and that did not make me very happy.

I don't know what I did. I've been good. I don't pee in the den. I don't even growl at the UPS guy or the mail lady these days. Yes, I chased Bambi a few times but I didn't hurt her. I don't think I deserved this dash of Karma. 

But maybe it was just a fluke. We got to a cross trail and Sadie went that way and Mom and I finished our normal route. Whew! I was sooooo relieved! 

Mom says I need to get over it, that Sadie is a nice girl and once she's older she'll be fine. I sure hope Mom is right because the occasional play date might be fun. Once she learns not to jump in my face, of course. 

It was great to get out and then get home before it got too hot. Mom says we're probably staying inside for a couple of hours since we got so overheated this morning. That sounds like a good idea to me. I need a nap and to rest my tired paws! 

Friday, August 20, 2021

Sometimes, it's just life

I have a really good life, even for a dog. Mom says the world revolves around me. I thought it revolved around the sun, but who am I to correct Mom? If she thinks it's all about me, I'll let her since it makes her happy. 

We've been busy the last few weeks. It's been life as usual, and that's okay. Dad's been using the Brush Crusher to clean up the woods, and Mom's been preserving food I don't like. Pickles? Ickky-poo! Peaches? Yuk! It's a good thing there are snackies in my jar. 

This summer has been the opposite of last year. Last year was cooler than normal and this year it's hotter. Dad has made sure I get to hop in the creek every day because when it's this hot, going for long walks doesn't leave us feeling real energetic. 

Mom's been home for the last eight days. Someone at the day job she wants to leave came down with the Covid-19 virus everyone is talking about. Mom wasn't anywhere near them, but she won't go back into the building until it's been sanitized. Actually, she told me she might not go back at all, that the people who got sick are something called 'anti-vaxxers' and Mom's afraid she'll snicker at them and she knows that won't be very kind. I like it when Mom works from home. I get more snackies. 

I've been on a lot of rides lately, too. This is a good thing. Dad and I like to ride along with Mom when she's running a quick errand. We stay in the car with the air conditioning running. Mom knows it's a waste of gasoline, but she thinks it's more important that Dad and I get out of the house from time to time. 

Another thing that's been going on is target practice. Dad's guns are loud! My parents wear ear protection but there's none for me so I have to stay inside all by my lonesome. I don't like this, but it is better for my hearing to stay safe. 

Sadie ran away from Cousin Dave one day and he had to come get her. Mom didn't mind she came up, but I don't think Cousin Dave was too happy. You know what? I've never run away from home like that. If you leave home, you might not get snackies and that would be a bad thing.

Someone named Fred brought a lot of rain with him up from the Gulf of Mexico the last couple of days. I don't know Fred. He didn't stop here, but Mom and Dad seem to think it's okay his trail passed over us. Maybe now that's it's rained, the heat will dissipate and Mom and I can get back to our walks. 

That's about it for now. It's a good life, but sometimes it gets boring.