This is how we do it

I remember a long time ago when Mom and Cousin Dave were splitting firewood. I didn't get to help much with that. Dad was on the John Deere and no one had time to throw the ball for me, so I napped on the patio. I don't think I missed too much excitement. 

Well, I did learn that splitting firewood creates a lot of extra pieces that aren't fit to go in the woodstove. Mom piled them up on the brush pile until it was huge! I've been sniffing around it some, but nothing like a groundhog or a skunk tried to live it - that's a good thing. 

Yesterday morning it started to snow. Snow falling on me and getting me wet is not a good thing. It's cold. I don't like it much. Playing in the snow after it stops falling on me is a lot better. Anyway... Mom said that it was the perfect time to burn the brush pile and did I want to help?

That's a stupid question! Of course, I want to help! I'm Deuce! Helping Mom and Dad is a good thing!

The only thing is, Dad didn't go along. 

Mom and me got into the pickup and drove over to the west forty and parked. Mom got out and started the fire, and boy did it burn! We were all nice and comfy in the truck, but Dad wasn't there. I don't like it when we're not all together. And I got bored. I asked Mom if I could get out of the truck and she took me back inside to check on Dad. 

Even with the snow, and then rain, the fire burned for hours. Mom and Dad weren't worried, though. The ground was way too wet for it to spread. The rain eventually put the fire out but not before almost all of it had burned. 

Maybe next time Dad will go along and he can play with me while Mom watches the fire. That would be much better. I wouldn't get bored. 

Deuce's Day, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce, black Labrador Retriever, a country dog, rural lifestyle, good dogs, companion dog, Chevy Colorado, brush, country living

What did I do?

Last night was not a good night. I don't know how it happened. I wanted out and now I forget who opened the door for me. What I do know is, my parents left me outside for two hours!! TWO HOURS! BY MYSELF!!!

Okay, so I'm a big boy and I can take care of myself. I don't wander off, not even down to see Cousin Dave and I really like him. 

I was outside for so long that it got dark and there are always strange noises after dark. Those spooky little owls were talking back and forth and I bet the discussion was about how to dive bomb me or some other nasty trick.  

It's a good thing I'm a smart dog. After a while, I got tired of waiting and I went around to Mom's office door and barked. THAT freaked her out because she'd forgotten me. Or maybe Dad forgot me. We don't remember. Anyway, she went looking for me and couldn't find me. 

Yeah, Mom. You misplaced little Deucie, didn't you? 

I really have to get over my dislike of going up the ramp to Mom's office door. If I'd been braver, I would have gotten her attention a lot sooner. That's how Loki does it and it always works for him. Even when Mom is busy writing, like last night, she'll see him and open her door. 

I guess I have to give the parents a pass. That's the first time ever I've been outside on my own for more than however long it takes for me to pee-pee. And one of them is always at the door watching to let me back in right away. 

I suppose I can't use the word "always" any longer, huh? 

If there's one thing I'm certain of it's that Mom will keep a closer eye on me and Dad from now on, and that might not be as good a thing as it sounds. We won't get away with anything.

Deuce's Day, black Labrador Retriever, a country dog, a writer's life, puppy parents, rural lifestyle, screech owls, forgotten dogs

Drat that fox!

 

What's a guy got to do around here to get a decent night's sleep? 

The parents and I were all snuggled down in the big bed this morning when the fox barked right outside the window. Well, I barked straight away because that's my job. Mom was out of bed immediately to check on Loki's whereabouts. We went out the back door and I barked some more! That did the trick and we didn't hear the fox again. 

Oh, yeah. Mom found Loki all safe and sound. I have to admit he's a smart cat and stays close to his hidey-holes where he'll be safe. If the fox is around, Loki won't come out until Mom is standing there to pick him up. And now that the fox is lurking again, Loki won't go back outside. He knows. He's smart like that. 

Anyway, what does a guy have to do to get enough sleep around here? If it's not the fox barking, it's the deer activating the driveway alarm and making the lights flip on and off. All Mom and I want is to sleep until daybreak, but nooooooo. 

C'mon, Mom. Let's go try to get forty more winks. 

Deuce's Day, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce, red fox, tired dog, country living, rural lifestyle, black Labs, a writer's life, Labrador Retrievers

What's a bomb?

There have been some big goings-on around here lately. Mom and Dad are busy all the time and I'm feeling a bit neglected. Dad's been working in the shed at his bench, mowing grass, fixing stuff, and target shooting. Mom's been cleaning her garden, canning food (I don't like pears!), writing in her office, and killing a copperhead. Yeah, I don't like that snake part, but she did it. 

But the biggest thing that's been going on was the tree trimmer came back and cut down Mom's favorite poplar tree. That was sort of scary. Dad and I were in the house and when that tree hit the ground, Dad said it was like a bomb went off! 

Okay. What's a bomb? Have I ever had a bomb to play with? I'm Deuce and I'm pretty smart, but I don't know anything about bombs. Why haven't the parents taught me about them? What does Mom mean it's above my pay grade? They don't pay me! Maybe snackies are my pay.... Hmmm...

Anyway...

The poplar tree was huge! Dad used the Brush Crusher 4200 to move them around so he and Mom could clean up the yard. I stood beside one of them and it was taller than me! And Mom spent one whole day doing nothing but burning brush from that tree. I helped her for a little while, but it got boring so I went and took a nap on the patio. 

Now we have to do a thing called splitting firewood. I've been told I can't really help with that and I'll probably have to stay in the house. I don't like it when they do that to me, but Mom says it's so I stay safe. If I have to stay inside, I'm going to nap on the bed.

Mom says firewood will keep us warm this winter. I know how lucky that makes me. A lot of dogs don't have parents who care about them and they won't be warm. 

Yep. There's been a lot going on and I've been soooooo busy keeping up with everything. Mom and Dad look out for me and keep the snackies coming. It's a pretty good life for a boy like me. 

Deuce's Day, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce, black Lab, a writer's life, Labrador Retriever, country living, rural lifestyle, firewood, poplar tree, tree trimming, fall garden

Meat for breakfast!

I must have been a very good dog! Mom got me a whole case of canned meat! It's all for me! And it's meat! Yum! Yumyumyumyum!

I wonder what I did to get this? I don't think it was because I knocked Mom down and got her hurt.  And it's probably not because I ask for tidbits from Mom and Dad's dinner plate. Hmmm. Maybe it's because I got tired of dry kibble and stopped eating. Mom always freaks out when I don't eat or drink, but sometimes a guy just isn't hungry.

Okay, I'm a Labrador Retriever and we, as a breed, have a reputation of eating everything in sight, but I've never been like that. Mom has never let me go without having food available, so I guess I don't have to worry about it the way some dogs do. I know how lucky I really am.

Mom says I'm supposed to get three cans a day, but she only gives me one for breakfast. That's because I have dry food in my dish in case I need more. Most days I just eat breakfast and have a few "good boy" snackies throughout the day and that's enough. But every couple of days I'll clean my plate - my breakfast comes on a paper plate - and then I'll finish off what's in my bowl. I think Mom and Dad trust me to eat what I need and stop. I like to stay svelte, you know. 

Mom put my meat on something called a subscription so it will be delivered by one of those sneaky blue vans that don't make any noise. I hate that! They can sneak up on me and I do not like it. But I guess if I get meat out of it, I'll learn to adjust. 

I'm Deuce and meat makes me a happy dog. Thanks, Mom!

Deuce's Day, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce, dogfood, picky eaters, country living, rural lifestyle, black Labrador Retriever, black Labs, black lives matter, good dogs, a writer's life, Purina One

I think I've been insulted

Mom and I got up early today and went for a little hike back the old homestead trail. I was sooooo glad to get out and go. Mom is still having trouble with her hip - it's been like ten weeks now - but she gets better every day. She said it didn't hurt at all after our hike so we might be able to go again tomorrow.

But I digress...

It was a really nice morning with the sunlight filtering through the trees and it was cool so there were, like, no bugs hovering around my face. I liked that part a lot. 

Mom had some work to do in her garden, so we didn't play around in the creeks. We did our walk and came home. 

Oh! And we did see Cousin Sadie on the way back. She did her normal crazed jumping at me, but then she sat down and behaved. I was pretty happy about that. She's not a bad dog, she's just young. She'll learn. 

But I'm digressing again...

I didn't know until just now Mom took a picture of my rump. She told me that the most frequent view she has of me when we go on a walk unless she has a snackie in her hand. It's not that I'm being a bad dog, but she knows I like to lead the way. 

But really, Mom! A picture of my butt? That is not my best side! 

I just wish she'd keep up with me! 

Deuce's Day, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce, country living, rural lifestyle, a writer's life, black Labrador Retriever, dog walks, walking in the woods, simple country pleasures, good dogs

My cat Loki stares at me

I have a cat and his name is Loki. Okay, so maybe he's really Mom's cat, but she keeps telling me he's mine, like my little brother. What if I don't want him? 

He was cute when he was a little kitten, but now? Maybe not so much. He likes to jump at me and bat at my face. I do not like this. 

And he drinks from my water bowl. And if I get canned food when he happens to be watching, he wants to nibble some. I do not like this, either! 

And sometimes he sleeps on my bed! I really do not like this! There's only room for me, Mom, and Dad on the bed. Loki can sleep anywhere else he wants and I tell him so in no uncertain terms. 

I guess Loki is okay - for a cat. He spends a lot of time on the patio and he never claws the screens. He just looks out and watches the birds. Sometimes he'll go catch one, but not too often. Mom says he'll never catch healthy birds because they're too fast for him. He catches old ones that would probably die when the weather turns cold. 

But here's the thing - all of a sudden Loki is in the house all the time. What's up with that? It's like he's tired of fresh air or something. He watches me ALL THE TIME! Last night he sat and stared at me for a long time and he never blinked! He's making me nervous. I wonder what he's up to but Mom says I should ignore him. 

Seriously, Mom? I can't ignore him. I can't turn my tail on him because he'll jump at me! You say he's trying to play, but I say he's attacking! 

Mom! He's looking at me again!

Deuce's Day, black Labrador Retriever, country living, rural lifestyle, cats and dogs, dog with a blog, dog stories, a writer's life, tuxedo cat, Loki, black pets

I missed all the excitement

Sometimes it's good to be the dog, and sometimes it's not. Yesterday was a "not" day. There were big goings-on in my front yard and the parents trapped me in the house. I didn't get to keep an eye on them. They heard me barking, though, you can bet on that. What happened is this -

There are a lot of trees in my yard and Mom and Dad monitor them. When branches break, the parents drag them to a brush pile and when it rains, they burn the pile. This is fine because I get to assist. We all sit in the pickup with coffee and snackies and watch the fire. Yesterday was different.

Apparently, some trees can get so big they could fall over and crush the den...er...house. Mom and Dad don't want that to happen. They called a guy called a tree trimmer to come and cut down two big maple trees that were no longer healthy.

How can trees not be healthy? I don't get it. I didn't do it, either! I don't think I ever peed on either of those trees! 

Anyway, the guy came and cut down the trees. I could hear the chainsaw and I barked. And when the big limbs hit the ground, I barked louder! And when the trunks hit the group, I bitched a fit!!!!! What were they doing out there????

FINALLY Mom let me outside so I could check it out and then I did pee on the trees. On the very top leaves, too! 

Mom calls all the mess in the front yard "carnage." I call it a good thing. It's going to take a lot of brush burning to clean it up and that means a lot of snackies for me and a few naps in my pickup. 

I'm Deuce and I know when I just hit the jackpot! 

Deuce's Day, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce, Black Labrador Retriever, black Lab, country dogs, tree trimming, spoiled dogs, a writer's life, good dogs, rural lifestyle, smart dogs, dog with a blog

My "new" van is here!

I have a new ride! It's red! I like it!

I've been wondering what happened to my truck. It's been missing for a few days and now I know it's because Dad sold it. I sure hope he doesn't want to sell me. I'd be sad. 

Seriously, I know he never would because Mom would put a hurt on him. I'm her furbaby and that's all there is to that. 

Anyway.... I have a new van and I think I like it. It's really easy to jump into. Mom and Dad put the back row of seats down into this compartment, then did the same thing with one of the seats in the second row. I have gobs and gobs of room! 

Dad said it's a 2015 Town & Country, which is not exactly what he was looking for, but this van only has 39,000 miles on it. I'm not sure about that. A mile is a long way to walk so I can't even imagine doing that thirty-nine thousand times, but Mom agrees the mileage is "good."

Have I mentioned that the parents have some odd ideas? 

I guess it's okay that Dad sold my truck. Dad is going to take us to McDonald's for supper in the van. I love Mickey D's! I can have my very own puppy burger! I think he really wants to drive it and that's why we're going, but it doesn't matter. It will be fun! 

And maybe he'll stop at the ice cream place on the way back. I'll have to be sneaky and let him know I want him to turn in there. 

I'm Deuce. I know I can convince him. Convincing Dad is my superpower! 

Deuce's Day, Greenbrier Smokey Deuce, black Lab, Town & Country, ice cream, simple country pleasures, a writer's life, rural lifestyle, good dogs, dog with a blog, black lives matter, Retrievers,